Languid in Laos

"Y conocer...
que la vida, no termina
donde vos lo es...
ser asi no cuesta nada."

Reads: I've done loads of page turning, starting with "Paradise of the Blind" by Thu Huong Duong that NYC Mark lent to me some time ago...forgot about that one didn't you? This was a book about the delicate nature of Vietnam, its people, culture, and the "Communist Reform" and it's lack of clemency on the petite bourgeoisie and the utter mechanistic form that communism takes on when put into practise. Then I went from "Chasing Cezzane" by Peter Mayle that had me laughing several times out loud and "Man and Boy" by Tony Parsons which was sad with a splash of laugh on life...but definately more sad. Then I picked up a book after crossing the Mekong into Thailand called, "Mekong" by Paul Adirex (American pen name of Thai author) about the MIAs in Laos and a number of other very memorable things I learned in Laos. It's a great overview of some of the culture, the history, the legends, and the territory that I've only brushed through; however some of the dialogue reads like a teenage detective novel which has me thinking that I'll surely put it down b4 I finish it...just 2 many other great books that I'm carrying around, ie. 2 much weight. And yep, as I return to this posting I confirm I've laid it down as well as a story that many of you may have seen on the cinema screen; "The Remains of the Day" by Kazuo Ishiguro.

Photo Pholder: Lil' bit of Laos is the only folder I've put up, cuz my photo opportunities have been less than rewarding due to rain, smoke (slash n' burn), and right moments. Besides that, I really can't be bothered to take my camera out anymore. Call me jaded...I'm sick of temples, sick of caves, and sick of waterfalls--guess I'm in the wrong part of the world ;) Anyway, wander thru some temples, some faces, some rivers, and what not if ya'd like. For me, the joy is in the faces of the village children and elderly.

Music: I returned to some of my favorites of summer 2005--Atlanta, primarily Bright Eyes, Death Cab For Cutie, Matt Pond PA (kicks ass!!!) Dios Malos, The Mountain Goats, Iron and Wine, The Stars, and CYHSY's first album. Then I had some good "me" moments with some old friends, Babasonicos and their Infame album.

Film: Saw "Apocolypto" by the aussie, Mel and was super impressed with the acting; great capacity to express emotions of life. Later I saw "Little Miss Sunshine" on a bus ride thru Thailand, so couldn't really see all of it; seemed decent.

Laos was a load of loungin', lazin' and laughin''; in short it was well needed and the "right time" for me to see it. Having said that, I didn't really have any amazing moments that warrant retelling. Laos was, to me, a country where I met a load of fantastic (in the literal sense) people with even more fantastic stories. Just a few that are noteworthy:

In Vientiane I climb the stairs and see 2 blokes working on their bikes with a couple bottles of beers to assuage the sticky, unrelenting heat and I ask, "Hey guys, whatcha up2?" Briefly, they flew from their home country of Belgium to Hanoi with their bikes. They're gonna ride back home. Yeah, that's Vietnam to Belgium on bike...pretty evil task guys...best of L.

In Muang Ngoi Neua I met Rocky...this fkn guy is a character; typical English--he's got the charm to say just about anything and still, it come across as classy. He exudes true ability to tell stories like the uncle I never had and the one some of you may become (Kyle Kilness, Zach Eliopolus). Furthermore, he's just got/had balls the size of jackfruits.

He started his travel only after working in an England Shoppe when some Scot walks in and tries to sell him something; "Someone's always tryin' to sell ya something right?" Brooms, Telephone Cards, KNIVES!" But this fine chap was selling fake £100 notes; the deal was buy £1000 for just £250. So our friend Rocky shells out 250 thinking, "with this weeks wages and the extra £1000, I can nab a ticket to India." He gets that ticket and proceeds to embark on the most scandalous of all travelling accounts. He begins by selling his traveller's cheques on the black market in someone elses name--that's right his cheques in another's name--then calls AMEX to claim they were stolen. He takes his stolen money with the real TC money and commences to talk to other traveller's on the street...just anyone who will stop and listen. "Hey mate, do you use traveller's cheques? yeah?!?" So after a convincing arrangement, he took these people's traveller's cheques and cashed them himself (this was some time ago, obviously, because in Laos' black market no one asked to see his passport) then used that money to buy passports off of foreigners and sell them to a market for loads of money. He ended up with a whole hell of a lot of money; around $9000US on a month's scams.

But the thing is that the highest note up until just recently was worth only $2US, so he had 3 bags full of these tiny bills under the bed of his dorm which just happened to be turned into an opium den by the owner in exchange for not ratting on Rocky. The problem was that Rocky had a shitload of Kip (Laos currency) and no one wanted (and still doesn't want) Kip so he had to somehow get rid of all this money he had "earned". He ran into a Japanese guy who told him of getting an airline to allow an exchange of Kip for dollars by jumping several formality hoops--basically, another scam. He went to the counter, filled in as many names and passport numbres as he could remember and was told to come back in 3 days; enuf time for the money to be sent from Vientiane to Luang Prabang. His perseverance led him to behind an alley where he damn near dropped all the bags and ran, provoked by a paranoia (surely due to loads of drugs) that Interpol had finally caught up with him. In fact, it was a counting room where he got the boatload of money after which he fled the country and continued to India where money was spent and more stories conspired. He was deported from India...ahh, it just goes on.

In Pakse, while I was sick with some lil' bug I met this Dutchman who went into the jungle on a motorbike that he rented. He just drove for hours and found several little roads that went into jungle villages and he stopped and tried to mingle with the locals; he couldn't speak Laos, surely couldn't speak their dialect and of course these people couldn't speak Dutch nor English. Several days/attempts later, they finally agreed to "let" him sleep in their village. He saw the kids climb up trees and catch birds for to cook and eat. Then he saw the men head off into the village to hunt; they demanded he NOT come. He swore that these people thought he was a magician or something; "If I had told them it was going to rain tomorrow, they would've believed me with their life." The men came back and cooked up their catch, a nice meaty macaque. Of course, he couldn't be rude and refuse, so he indulged (if one could muster that) in the monkey and found himself voilently feverish, with wrenching stomach aches, etc. He swore it was malaria, but after returning, he found it was just something he ate.

In Muang Sing, I met this Frenchman Chirard, who 20 years ago hitch-hiked from San Fran to NYC and back in 6 months. He stayed with a family in Iowa and helped them on a farm. Then he did the same thing in Utah..."yikes!" I said (as I'm sure you all did), but he said it was actually a great experience...as one would say. He said it was so easy back then, and people were so friendly. "Yeah, a LOT has changed since then my friend", I told him.

Also in Muang Sing, I met this Crazy Canadian (sorry 2B redundant) Christine who has been away for a couple years following random people and doing random things. It totally fits this chick if you saw her for a minute, no more. In Laos, she was helping this band Cyclown Town follow around a local group who was performing at carnivals...so she yes...became a carny for several weeks. She had some music to share that was orchestrated by the aforementioned band, comprised of 2 Americans (accordian and violin), an Italian, a Frenchman, an Argentinian, and someone else. They made some crazy carni noise that wasn't all unbearable. She enjoyed my Clap Your Hands Say Yeah intro from the first album.

I found my way into some lovely totally chilled out villages that embodied picturesque, though the photos don't show it thanks to slash and torch.


Muang Ngoi Neau

Phonsavon: Remnants of U.S. bombing in "The Secret War"

And some unfortunate villages that soaked the havoc that heavy bombing can inflict. An amazingly interesting man in Kongkeo that told me so much of this little known (in my country) disaster that was a subsequent disaster of Vietnam. This village used so much of the scrap found for random things, like this fence made from torpedo shellings. In my photo album you also see a bird house made from a jeep's remains, and another torpedo shell made into a trough for the animals.

Finally, I met this old Akha lady who tried to sell me everything...I mean everything man. She was so cute with her wrinkly old skin, red-stained gums and no teeth, eyes that saw a thousand lifetimes, and smile that made anyone who looked at her hold nothing but affection. This was the lady who kneeled down discreetly, nudged me, and said, "hey...how much? 20,000kip, okay." I looked in her plastic sack and saw that she had picked up a rock the cheeky granny. I loved her to death and we laughed till my growin' gut ached. I bought some other stuff off of her and will only be a stain in her fractured memory, but even for that I feel a bit fortunate.

"mama" on the right"

So that's just the few I remember at this session of posting, but I know that throughout my life, random attacks of laughter will surface when these and other memories are ignited by the most irrelevant events.

The Sum: Entered Laos via 4000 Islands and left on a bus climbing a pass that had to crawl over more than 4000 pieces of coal thrown over the road by a jack-knifed rig, whose driver was grateful of my inferior 1st-aid skills; though the entire bus that waited 4 me was less than grateful with all the horn-honking and shouting to get back on the bus. And everything in between was just sippin' Beerlao on rivers and riversides, burning all sorts of local products, trying to force down the local whiskey/fire water, and baguettes...ahh, the baguettes. This is the only thing the French left in Laos that was good...that's not entirely true, but I'll leave others to correct me.

For the most part, Laos was a month where I fell into a lull of travelling. This is absolutely common and not 2B confused with "Times up!--Abort mission!!!" panic. It was the perfect country in which to relax, soak up the lovely loafin' that Laotians do, and enjoy life in its only moment, the present. I did, and I got over the lull. I'm so excited to get into India right now...the chaos, the culture, the chilly climate in the north, the constant calamity of sights to see...oh, I'm sooo over the lull!

Currently, back in Thailand getting my Indian Visa and sorting out an expesive flight; the latter of which I'm thrilled. Bangkok is so up to its throat in idiots, that I've stopped trying to understand their inability to understand...ass-clowns abound! The real pain is spending more time on the toilet than in front of world renown food...but I'll spare you any more visuals--hahaha, damage already done! Just 2 days remaning which will be me buying gear for too much money, but people pay in one way or another, I suppose.

Julian just left for the same country; Andy is sitting beside me, having just recovered from too many party favours in Laos; Ian is with 2 girls doing the work of 2 men, and I am loving that somehow 3 guys I met in the most random places--J, on the border of E. Timor/Indonesia, Andy, in Friendly's Gsthouse (Manila), and Ian, in Kalibo (Ati-Atihan)--all have come full circle to enjoy each other's banter and natural chemistry again. I really do feel I've been shambolic in telling about these characters...you'd all luv 2 hear anecdotes about our memories made--let's save that for when we all gather round a table full of sudsy beers and movin' muzic...LET'S!