Full-On Festival Fun

Julian, June (owner of bar), Andy, Ian, and Author of this word stumble
Kalibo--Ati-Atihan Festival 2007

Lingering Lyrics:

"Sometimes...when sailors are sailin' they...think twice, 'bout where their anchor landed...I think I could make better use of my time on land. I drink less...cuz lord knows I could use a...warm kiss, instead of a cold goodbye. I'm writing the folks back home to tell them...hey-eh-eh-I...I'm doin' alright!!!"

The Format

A full calendar year has elapsed since I first arrived in the first country of this journey, New Zealand, and it seems like a lifetime ago. Much has happened in the ONE month gone by since last post; primarily 3 festivals, regrouping with people met along the phili-path, lots of loud banging music right out hotel windows, another brilliant dive, spending lewd amounts of loot, copious imbibing, an enormous pizza conquered, very little sleep, heaps of memories made, and a whole load of good fun clearly displayed in my ever-increasing smile.

Andy, Me & Shot Girls...we opted 4 da pitcher(s)
(Iloilo City--Dinagyang Festival)

I've traded the "mister" of "hello mister" (Indonesia) to "joe"..."Hey Joe!" here in Phili country. I gotta say I like the latter much more...even understanding it's origin, which surely you can formulate. I've gotten used to (and actually now thoroughly enjoy) the eye-brow raise which signifies "hello" or "yes". Speaking of "yes"..."oh oh po" (which sounds like uh-oh) means yes...disconcerting at first; imagine you asking "is there a restroom here?" and hearing "uh-oh poo"...or in the Visayan dialect(central isles) "dai"=friend, leaves me with "oh oh dai" or uh-oh DIE. Restroom is actually "CR" (Comfort Room) in this country and most are far from comfortable, though they've relieved me from several spouts of uncomfortable moments. I tried to climb a mt. and a volcano, but the recent typhoon destroyed any possibility of either. And because I was unable to ascend these peaks in Buko Area (buko=coconut), like a 12 year old boy, I opted to taste the local cuisine; ie. I ate fresh coconut pie until I suffered a stinging stomach ache...then I ate some more.

I should have known things would get strange when I stopped by the town Los Banos (The Bathrooms ;))) though other translations exist) and decided as I sometimes do, to not go straight to the hotel. Instead, I would tote my huge pack around a city that seemed to be completely devoid of another hotel than the one I "knew about". I had a tricycle driver then tote ME to Lakeside Hotel and Restaurant, which turned out to be a Karaoke Bar that served Sprite and Fried Bananas among other things. I continued to run around town before I stumbled on the hotel that I originally was going to...it appeared to be the ONLY one in this town of more than 50,000. L8r, I would see that a well-lit sign of sticks on a BBQ titled, "Pork BBQ" was really an ice-cream stand, another restaurant would also prove to only offer karaoke, a train running smack thru midtown had no train station, and other oddities that I fail to recall now, a month later only allowed me to scratch my head and move on in confusion.

Then, after hopping a boat to some random Romblon Islands, I entered another world...this might be the poster boy--

Boy in Training (Ati-Atihan)

--Tanduay Rum n' Chaser--

Photo Pholder: I've had some great times and great photos 2 represent a bit of the festivals that have held me in intoxicated awe the last 2 weeks. So many pics, but a few can be found in Romblon, while there's a massive folder Ati-Atihan. Loads of video that I'm havin' a tough time loading...so you're not entitled to this footage :P

Reads: "The Secret Sharer" Joseph Conrad is about a stowaway and is almost ambiguous enough to imply multi-personality disorder. I'm on another of his short stories now.

Flics: "40 Year OldVirgin", and finally (apt 4 my life) "The Terminal", and "Star Wars" the original...I finally saw again.

Muzic: First and foremost, the big bang of base drums thumping outside my window at Ati-Atihan festival--non-stop 3 days, without ANY option to stifle--one sure way to "set" you IN the festival. Aside from that, heads up for a fantastic band, Margot & The Nuclear So and So's; they offer some slower poignant tracks, but the more upbeat and spiteful of past relationships "The Skeleton Key" is my absolute fave; the album...The Dust of Retreat. Also on sound is Page France who have 3 Fantasmagoricalicious Albums...my fave track is "Chariot" talking of the hypnotic nature of religion...over a very catchy music line; rhythmic and rhymin' . I'm still lovin' Pablo's "Loser Crew" which pumps me up no matter what my mood: "I came with the loser crew, you said you saw us coming...brought back when I was young, I know I'm not dumb, boys cause a lot of casualties.").

*#$*^*#$*^===>> Finally, the muze of the month was the album Nice and Nicely Done, by Spinto Band. Opening up with a very vocal piece, "Did I Tell You" which plays to the love of life alongside relationship: "The fact that there’s water on top of this planet The opportunity for me to walk in it". But my fave track is the more pop sounding "Oh Mandy" that catches you mouthing or more boldly singing while dancing regardless your location: "Sure I had trouble from the onset...I tried to chase things I coul--dn't get...Show me a rerun on the W...Show me a rerun on the WB...So what's it like to be in it...and move away to the Midwest...I gotta message for your auntie--I gotta message for your auntie." I'm not gonna review this whole album, but it's a great album whose every track is very unique...it's fresh, it offers good lyrics, and yet it doesn't ignore the obvious importance of good, hair-raising riffs that stay with you the day long. Check out the sample of songs you can access here.

...where was I???

I stumbled outta Luzon, onto a boat with the most fortunate of fortune--that's to say arriving at the pier 15 mintues b4 the only ferry 4 that day departed to the island I wanted...I was happy I went to "check the schedule" with my bags--and wound up in the islands of Romblon. Lesser known, sure...and thus, why I chose to visit them among other appeals. However, where my fortune really enriched me was realizing I showed up the very weekend of their yearly festival; what a great party it was. But this was the calmest of the 3 festivals...as seen by the pics.

In the midst of the great festivities, I managed to dive with Ivan (Swiss-French) who was a good bloke and had a great story of how he managed to be there. The end of the story was his wife in a coma after the birth of their youngest daughter, Ivana, who is absolutely the cutest girl I've ever had the pleasure of being around...truly a doll personified.



Ivana poses with puppy

Angela & Ivana

Boarded the Queen Mary for an island which led me to a jeepney of which I jumped on the roof and ducked branches and electricity cables to another port town where I boarded a tiny boat that skipped and splashed past the famous island of Boracay--which I avoided wholeheartedly--and into the port town of Caticlan bound for the festive town of Kalibo which hosts the Hugely famous festival Ati-Atihan. It was here I met up with another yank, Jullian, who I met in Indonesia just after my remarkable experience in East Timor; an English friend of his, Ian--lothario doesn't begin to explain his "desires"--and Andrew, who I met in Manila randomly...as ya do. This was the cast that would last the 4 days of fiesta frothin', debaucherous dancin' event in Kalibo 2007. Ati-Atihan is suppose to be the Mardi Gras of the Philippines and I can only offer that it certainly stepped up to the plate with regard to continuous quaffing.

From Aklan Province (Capital City: Kalibo)

To Iloilo City...capital of province...

and now moving on to Negros Occidental.

J & I bussed it down to Iloilo City 4 another Fiesta that would take place the following weekend; turned onto it by the lady who extended ALL OF OUR visas to remain in this glorious archipelago ANOTHER 2 months!!! Andy followed later and we did another round of what we do. Great lines were found in this weekend. Our rules which we just couldn't seem to follow like, rule #1: "DON'T wander off!!!" Walkin' down the street and hearin' a kid scream, "Hey Joe...see ya next year!!!" and the classic pissed off his head returnin' to casa with fam, "Hey Joe...the night is over" with perfect slur...we pissed ourselves laughing...it was great fun.

The 3 who continue still..."...I'm doin' alright!!!"

Iloilo City did offer a bit different style of festival, but what it lacked in drunken street dancin' it made up for in colorful costumes, live music, festival food, and "scene of the crime" locals that might just be recounted by locals who witnessed our somewhat stereotypical behavior. Not 2 say that there wasn't serious consumption in Iloilo's Dinagyang...obviously-->

One of many in the streets...I should say,

--this isn't me!

One thing Julian and I did agree on is that the next place will be somewhere that we can both exercise...4-SHURE!!! Booze Belly, Languid Lying about, and Glassy Eyed Exposure can describe my last week or 3. We 3 see a trio until Sugar Beach near Sipalay (SW Negros) in 10 days or so.

Now we're movin' from Iloilo City to Bacolod and up into the mountains, basing ourselves in Silay City (Negros). Unfortunately, the volcano Mt. Canlaon is closed due to weather; but stomping around the parks and mountains is definately in order and back to where I can breathe fresh air and wake to the sound of silence.

To get an idea of where the hell we are in the Philippines...

...to get a better idea, come join the fun! Until I send a round of cold cocktails your way...play on people...PLAY!

Phili-Phiesta...BnMe: Round 2

The Legendary Simon & Brian


Snickers anyone??? 4 Simonster
---> see profile Mindless Man in Manila (me, not him)


After 2 rhetorical questions it was str8 2 Tanduay--the quencher that stays with ya from the philippines...maybe a bit of coke too. Somehow Simon and I were magnetized by our dual natures and found each other several times after the initial intro in Manila. Brian, Simon, Sean--an aussie who intro'd me to a guy who took me to 11 local bands that made for a great Wednesday night--and I pulled our chairs in a drunken circle (ie. oval) and swapped stories of months past and tingled our spirits 4 the next 7+ days to come. Jan 30 we were off 2 Pipeline, where Simon and I got our groove on with the help of Jack n' his hooch coke, while Brian was finding his zone and Ken--the "hook-up"--was fending off the bill...fine chap he was. Somehow we got wind of green acres and burned off 2 a baking club Vuduu; grooved and moved till the booze oozed and ladyboys were unvealed, finally making 4 a 5am breakie call that the girls workin' the resto weren't ready 4; mango/banana shakes all around to push the hang a couple days over. B&me walked the streets the next morn and rediscovered reunion. Chatting amongst ugly x-mas decorations, we agreed on much and left much more undiscussed. NYE had us on our heels and we were begging to be pushed over; however, Sunflower would offer us only 20 minutes of crowd chatter/silence b4 Brian's lashing oration of fierce and unwavering principle that muzic is a must on any night we usher in a 007; wherein they started the show...nice work B-man! Bri, Si and I visited every bar in Cebu City that night, but NYE2007 in CC was a house venue ostensibly. In cebu Brian and I managed a lil' hike up to the aptly named point of a mountain called "Tops".




Mactan Island (ASEAN Summit held here) & Cebu City

The little bit of sunset we could manage

As uneventful as the incoming was, it did allow us the motivation and mind-control 2 push south 2 Moalboal 4 something unknown. Better sounding than Malapascua which B & I discussed more than 2 months up to his arrival, we decided to scrap the original plan. Simon would follow thanks 2 B&my persuasive tendencies. Moalboal (mo-all bo-all) also lacked the peg we wanted 2 stick, though Si and I boated off to Pescador Island 4 a wall dive that was just ok. The next morn it wasn't a surprise we were all on the same page; that being 2 skip 4 chapters 2 the heart of Phili-Phun.

Boarding a bus w/out open seats, we all stood and stared at eachother with locals in between. B managed 2 squirm into a seat and chat up some old dude while Si and I dreamed of the next step.

Sayin' goodbye 2 Simon, B&I left 4 a tiny town that even the locals didn't know existed...though it was just over 2 hills and 2 jeep connections away. We wanted to get to the circular island of Bohol by night's fall, which required us to first go 2 a pier that would (in our minds) have a boat docked w8n to transport the 2 of us from Cebu to Bohol. We were dropped at the junction 2 walk 500meters to a pier that had old men playin' pool in a kiosk/bar getting wasted, girls splashing in the sea hollering 4 the white boys' shirts to sail, but not the one thing we wanted...the boat 2 the island we wished to sail 4.

B had a brilliant idea and demanded we pause 4 prayer 2 San Miguel...2 liters of his confessional kiosk komfort actually. Some dude came up 2 disclose that he worked 4 a secret op (not so secret if 2 foreigners arrive and find him out w/out even asking b4 they finish the first bottle) in prep 4 the ASEAN summit (that is now underway). He was so happy that his moustache feigned his countenance...a lil' 2 happy. He offered us, as did 1 very drunk boatman, 2 transport us 2 Bohol. However, B & I agreed we wanted 2 survive this gr8 adventure and declined multifold.



The dog at the kiosk looked in better
condition than the boatman


Neither of us know how we ended up in this little known town of Argao but it would be the 1st night that would carry into day without a lull. One and a half spit-roasted chickens l8r, we were accompanied by 2 females 2 a pier with a karaoke bar where B put his efforts 2 the Bon Jovi ballad "Bed of Roses" which he claimes he's never heard...I claim I've never heard it sung like THAT! I tried the night's theme, "People Are Strange" (which also got no applause) and after declining an evening of unknown pleasure with the 2 counterparts, we grabbed 4 our advisor Tanduay. It was looking like another dull evening in some 2 horse town (our horses). We strolled down darkened streets we probably shouldn't have, then proceeded 2 buy another session of Tanda-therapy and hit the pier again. We passed the cathedral where B was relieved 2 relieve himself on a surrounding wall b4 we found a stiff seat at the end of the road and beginning of crashing waves.

Sitting at the pier we found out how little we knew about eachother. A good heart-2-heart while sippin' our sublimity and we were up moving slowly back 2 town where we met 7 boys who told us of a party where there were lots of "chicks" (they love that word here). I've heard this tale told thousands of times and was skeptical, but after some BBQ sticks and the final sip of our bottle, we were game.

Big Bang of a get down surprise HIT it was and I was back 2 the dance floor (4 I'd been swingin' it the 3 nights prior). In short, Bri paid the entrance of all 9 of us, then bought the kids a beer. I taught 2 5yr olds how to shake their asses, then 2 22yr old girls taught me how to shake MY ass, and in the background I only heard my wingman claiming that "it's always the fat chicks dude!"--Maybe not always bro, but definately THAT night--toasted "prost" with a drunk Norwegian at this local fiesta--wtF was he doing there?...I guess U could ask the same of us--and a ladyboy or 4 offering their dancing+ services, and an exchange of lost mobile #s all occurred b4 we had 1 of "my girls" pushing us onto her moped to drive us back to our cottage...romantic I know...local time 3:45am. At this point, I should mention that our boat was to leave at 5am and we had a good hour to get to our place and then to the pier...FAT chance we'd actually make the boat, which would prove the drunken tricycle driver that gave us a life earlier, correct...and we couldn't have that. We stumbled into the room with our stuff, grabbed it, and made a go 4 the road. After I ran frantically 2 catch a tricycle that wasn't there, I lay on my big backpack drunk, void of hope, full of acceptance and happy at that hour under the stars. Somehow B scurried away and returned with a tricycle...I have no idea how. His savior looked very Japanese to me and there we were driving along the shore, Brian in the sidecar (attached by weld) and me behind the driver-san. The hum of the motor on the darkened coastal highway we floated like samurais and as we approached the intersection the driver was flashing his light at the boat. We made the turn, flew the 500m earlier walked, jumped aboard, ran up the stairs and before we could sit down, the boat was unmoored...U RULE DUDE!!! Arigatao and Mushi-Mushi to Bohol.

B & me fell into a lovely sleep with serene smiles at the joy of the unexpected and the reward of spontaneity. We arrived 4 hours l8r and would curse those very virtues 4 having left us delirious and burdened with finding jeep connections, a hotel that had a vacant room on the beach, and all in the hot sun. Finally, we were stationed on Alona Beach, Panglao, Bohol and it would give us 1.5 days of another chapter.



U can't find 2 sexier dudes...than our boatmen


We rented (rather B rented) a couple bikes and we were TOTALLY Easy Rider...no really, we WERE! After a bit of financial fiasco we returned to our place and B prematurely passed out for the first time in all the years I've known him...he IS human after all. Next morn was on a boat to the beautiful and famous island of Balicasag where we would snorkel for a couple hours before the rain would crash our undersea party. We grabbed a shower, then dinner, then B felt a return of our Indo ending in stomach rejection and was in for another early night as I talked with an older Englishman about the beauties of the Philippines at a bar. Bohol consisted of all this in addition with me trying the mango shake making capabilities of each waitress before Bri did the inconceivable and talked me into returning to Manila for the last 2 days. Actually, he did one better and funded the trip that would be the ending.



I think this is the point of stomach failure


1st night in MNL was gr8 4 both of us as we danced the night away in a likable club. The next morning I strolled into the hotel at 14:00 to find Simon and Brian chatting over a pool side table--SURPRISE!!!

As usual, the plans 4 our last night didn't once fall onto the track of actually events. Simon and I were absolutely lovin' life as B was fendin' off the urban crew of confusing panhandlers. We all split up and would only find each other the next morning.

As it always is, the butterflies of the "end" fluttered all about me while B and I had break; Simon and B were both set 2 leave that day. However, after learning from past experiences, I decided 2 NOT stay and pursue all the potential; rather I would also gtFk outta infamous MNL. It sucks 2b left where so many memories were made. So I set into motion the 3rd dimension and we were all 3 flowing outward like the top-view of a triangle.



3 Kings by Robelle's Pool

This could be written so much better, but it was a phregin' phunkphest phat phili phiesta is what it was. Though the last taste may have been sour B, I know we'll both recall all those moments that kept our feet racin' 4 more with a grin in store. Cheers 4 everything and all that'll greet us next time...yes...NEXT TIME!